Showing posts with label google. Show all posts
Showing posts with label google. Show all posts

Thursday, July 16, 2009

In the wilds of New Jersey



Not enough that the month of June reminded me of London, now I have to contend with strange critters in my suburban Jersey home. The other day I found my Jack Russell - Duke bouncing off the garage doors. Not unusual by any means. What was unusual was the response inside of the garage to his mighty pounding paws. Screeches, growls and hisses. Closer I went to investigate and came eye to eye with a raccoon. She recoiled. I jumped and squealed like a little girl at a Twilight premiere. Happens to the best of us, I don't care if I can take down an entire bottle of Cuervo at one sitting, I still get rattled by furry critters with pointy clawlike hands, especially when they are protecting their young. Which this mama raccoon was as evidenced by the ruckus inside the garage.

I wisely grabbed the dog and bolted inside. He was rather put out by being abruptly removed from the noisy object of his fascination. I told him to watch the Animal Planet and consulted Google about *raccoon new jersey*. This is what one listing says:

A raccoon is often rabid, without showing any outward symptoms of the viral disease. The public's fascination with this native New Jersey animal, rabies becomes even greater a threat than previously thought. Not only can a raccoon carry (and spread) the rabies virus; the female raccoon can actually pass the virus to her unborn kits through her uterus.

Despite what a group of Nutley animal activists believe, I am an ardent animal supporter. I fervently support the protection of wolves from that helicopter riding, aerial shooting Sarah Palin. I'm happy to foster small critters and babysit fish, birds and reptiles (although I draw the line at snakes...) But when it comes to the safety of my dog, my elderly cane-dependent parents and myself, I confess I'm all for establishing my boundaries.

So in comes a specialist who rummages through the garage rafters. No raccoon nests here, he informs me casually. Although apparently the squirrels have been stockpiling twine, rubber foam and other winter goodies that make a squirrel's life toasty during snow days. Just to make sure, the wildlife guy sets a trap to catch any unwanted visitors. You'll set what you catch free? I ask nervously. Appalled at the thought of my visiting raccoons being sold for their coats. Or even worse, to some backwoods Pennsyltucky Cletis for food. The wildlife guy assures me he releases the catch in a wildlife habitat that could accommodate a new entry - such as the woods.

The trap catches nothing till the dog decides to investigate and nearly gets caught himself. He slinks indoors, suitably chastized by the encounter. I retreat indoors as well, sobered by the realization that as much I love nature and wee animals, there is no Disney happy ending when it comes to the two of us conjoining living spaces. Moreoever nature is sometimes disturbing, not always tidy but always demanding of respect.

Thursday, October 04, 2007

7 Things That Don't Suck


The priest of cosmic parody, Rob Breszny of FreeWill Astrology entreated readers in his newsmail to make lists of this very thing. In honor or Reverend Rob, here's my list of things that don't suck. Send me yours.

1. Google. On top of making my day with slams against Dubya, Google delights in playing with their own logo. I believe the above is Canada's homage to Autumn Google. US Google actually depicted a Horn of Plenty on the Autumnal Equinox on September 23rd, but foolishly I didn't capture it. If anyone out there finds it, please shoot it my way?
2. Lucinda's Burrito Truck. I've been meaning to write a piece on the culinary delights of those mobile units that dispose of quality eats. Lucinda's is one of those. Always someone interesting standing by the yellow retro logo truck while I'm waiting for my breakfast burrito. The size of a grenade and about as heavy, this egg, cheese and chorizo filled beauty warms the belly with a perfect blend of tastes and textures. Voluptousness wrapped in a tortilla.
3. Ugly Betty. Just caught the season premiere which only solidified my belief that this is the best written comedy on TV. How about that portrait of evil fashion editor Wilhamenia Slater with Dick Cheney? Come ON! It's freaking brilliant.
4. Energetic Body Massage. Owner Isabelle Dassinger of the Healing Zone in Montclair, NJ hires some of the most talented alt healers this side of Deepak Chopra. Ask for Andrea.
5. The Thorns Never would have thought to band this bunch of guys together, but glad they did. As far as rhapsodic road music goes, these guys rock.
6. Although Autumn brings the strange inclination to stuff my face with meats and sweets my body seems to handle it well. Doesn't hurt that I exercise 5 days a week and take hard core AB classes to boot. Highly recommend Vanessa's or Miquel's Core Ab Classes at the NYSC at Harborside, NJ.
7. Storks. My commute happens to take me by the NJ Meadowlands Center in Lyndhurst, NJ. I'm usually able to spot red-winged blackbirds, herons, storks, ducks and swans. Today I spotted dozens and dozens of storks feeding in the early morning marshland. They so didn't suck.